Funniest Football Chant

Morgan Villa has submitted the following and I agree, it’d be nice to take our minds off the window for a while;

Its been getting tense on here the last few weeks, with performances of the board, coaching staff and playing staff coming into some heated debates.

The transfer window is making me at the very least a bit uptight as it does every time it nears its close, so I thought I would post up something a little light hearted to take all of our minds off the tensions.

Having chatted to a few mates recently who support other clubs and watch their teams, we had a chat about football chants. This season I’ve not really heard any funny ones. Last year I thought the songs Joe Hart got were hilarious and fair play to him for being a good sport. I also thought it was brilliant last year when some poor bloke asked his Mrs to marry him at half time, as soon as he did the whole of Villa Park away fans included started chanting ‘You dont know what you are doing’. We also can’t forget our taking over of the Wigan home end last year.

The one that my mates said that made all of us laugh was a song sung by Utd fans at Liverpool and Everton fans ‘Feed the Scousers’ (to the tune of Do they know its christmas).

What has been the funniest chant you heard or know of from any club?

40 Comments

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  1. Dave Lee Roth and Lennie Kaye
    Dave Lee Roth and Lennie Kaye January 27, 2014 at 11:17 pm . Reply

    Yr teeth are offside to the cheating diving twat Suarez was very funny…

  2. alex chilton
    alex chilton January 27, 2014 at 11:25 pm . Reply

    I heard the Oldham fans singing their take on the Human League’s classic, in a cup match against Liverpool:

    ” Don’t you want me baby,
    Don’t you want me Ol-dham”

    Certainly the most pathetic you may ever hear. But at that its unforgettable .

  3. Benno
    Benno January 28, 2014 at 2:45 am . Reply

    West Hams fans to Jonjo Shelvey:

    ‘He’s coming for you…he’s coming for you’
    ‘Harry Potter…he’s coming for you’

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 9:34 am . Reply

      I don’t get it!

      1. Foxy
        Foxy January 28, 2014 at 9:41 am . Reply

        He looks like Voldemort. Try to keep up!

        I had to Google him to work it out…

        1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
          OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:02 pm . Reply

          I must be the only one on the planet that’s never seen harry potter. I just do get it. Watched a bit if the first one years ago and switched off so boring. Heard of voldermont but no idea what he looks like

          1. Bill Pearson.
            Bill Pearson. January 28, 2014 at 12:23 pm . Reply

            Jon Shellvey.. 🙂

  4. saddened
    saddened January 28, 2014 at 10:20 am . Reply

    The Karen Brady song was the best in years and very funny !

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:24 pm . Reply

      If I had the wings of a sparrow
      If I had the arse of a crow
      I’d fly over Bham city
      And shit on the bastards below 🙂

  5. Vaze
    Vaze January 28, 2014 at 10:41 am . Reply

    Darren Anderton coming over to our away end at Spurs and a spontaneous ‘Does your Doctor know you’re here ?’.

    Even he acknowledged it with a thumbs up and a smile.

    The Carson Yeung ate my dog one was pretty funny too I thought.

  6. BWS
    BWS January 28, 2014 at 11:30 am . Reply

    The Leeds fans away at Brighton singing ‘we can see you holding hands’ titled me.

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:05 pm . Reply

      Stoke fans a couple of years ago to Gareth bale “you look like a chimp, garage bale u look like a chimp” that tickled me.

    2. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:11 pm . Reply

      Park, Park
      where ever you may be
      you eat dogs in your country
      but to be fair to you
      your not scouse
      they eat rats in their council house.

  7. Mark
    Mark January 28, 2014 at 11:42 am . Reply

    Sali Salifou…..bullet bullet proof!!!

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:11 pm . Reply

      10 Alsatians walking down the street,
      10 Alsatians walking down the street,
      and if Ji-Sung Park should fancy one to eat
      there’ll be 9 Alsatians walking down the street.

      1. Mark
        Mark January 28, 2014 at 8:24 pm . Reply

        Sol Sol wherever you may be, not long now til………no wait you can’t sing that especially if you are a spurs supporter!!!!

      2. Mark
        Mark January 28, 2014 at 8:30 pm . Reply

        and also after a Blues player nearly ended Arsenal player Eduardo’s career and took his leg off……we than played Arsenal at the Emirates/…..

        Eduardo ohhhhhhhhh
        Eduardo ohhhhhhhhh
        He used to have silkily skills
        Now he walks like Heather Mills
        Eduardo ohhhhhhhhh

  8. DSVilla
    DSVilla January 28, 2014 at 11:49 am . Reply

    My favourite was when Chelsea fans sang to one of the Nevilles (Phil I think) to the tune of “you’ll Never walk Alone”
    Neville, Neville,
    You’re a c**t, you’re a c**t
    And you’ll always be a “c**t”
    You’ll always be a “c**t)

    Crude but very funny as it was so clear on Sky and the presenters had to ignore it.

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:04 pm . Reply

      I thought the Chelsea fans on Sunday had a good one. When they got the third v utd they sung “we want you to stay, we want u to stay, David Moyes we want you to stay” lol

  9. Astonb6
    Astonb6 January 28, 2014 at 12:00 pm . Reply

    He got bit by a shark
    He got bit by a shark
    Carlos tevez
    He got bit by a shark.
    When he last played for man city at villa park. Quality

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:08 pm . Reply

      Ha ha. Sung to Adams family. “Their father is their brother, their sister is their mother, they like to fuck each other the Neville family” ! Liverpool v utd lol

  10. BWS
    BWS January 28, 2014 at 12:08 pm . Reply

    The holte in the 70’s to Stan Bowles when his misses fucked off –
    where’s your wife gone where’s your wife gone, where’s your wife gone Stanley Bowles?
    Where’s the milkman where’s the milkman where’s the milkman Stanley Bowles?

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:17 pm . Reply

      Ha ha I remember that. And Charlie George, Charlie George, what a wanker, what a wanker lol.

      Asa Hartford man city, there’s a hole in your heart dear Asa, dear Asa, there’s a hole in your heart dear Asa a hole. Awful!!

      Malcolm McDonald v arsenal, intercourse, inter course he’s shagging the arse of his horse lol.

      To Liverpool fans in early 8o to ynwa song, “sign on, sign on with a pen in your hand, and ul never get a job, you’ll never get a job sign on ‘

      1. BWS
        BWS January 28, 2014 at 12:30 pm . Reply

        Lol and the all time classic – In their Liverpool scum.

        1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
          OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:57 pm . Reply

          Oh yes lol

        2. OohAhPaulMcGrath
          OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 1:01 pm . Reply

          Remember the Trevor Francis song to my mammy?

          Francis oh oh oh Francis
          I’d walk a mile and a bit to rub his face in the shit oh Fraaancis.

          Sung to blue noses in the 70s

          1. BWS
            BWS January 28, 2014 at 1:44 pm . Reply

            Or when he went to forest –
            Francis oh oh oh Francis
            You walked walk a mile and a bit to rub your face in the shit
            Oooh Fraaancis.

  11. Bill Pearson.
    Bill Pearson. January 28, 2014 at 12:29 pm . Reply

    Hey BWS, let’s see how many member this one, Nice one Cyril , nice one son, nice one Cyril let’s have another one. You know who so do I , just wonder how many do.

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 12:57 pm . Reply

      Spurs player in the 60s I think

      1. Bill Pearson.
        Bill Pearson. January 28, 2014 at 1:04 pm . Reply

        Correct give that man a prize, poor man died in 1991 age 47, but was Spurs tune for years, we have one think its a major song that other teams sing to us ever time they play. I just smile when sang because it means they are thinking of us. 🙂

    2. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 6:43 pm . Reply

      Sung to Cyril Regis as well

  12. Bill Pearson.
    Bill Pearson. January 28, 2014 at 12:43 pm . Reply

    You all give in ???

  13. Bill Pearson.
    Bill Pearson. January 28, 2014 at 12:49 pm . Reply

    Times up. give you a clue , Spurs player, Name of Cyril Knowles. They even did a recording of it.

    1. BWS
      BWS January 28, 2014 at 1:49 pm . Reply

      Cyril Knowles, class act as cool as a cucumber.
      Remember him taking the ball down on his chest on the goal line and then dribbling it out the box.
      Quality.

  14. GIDDYVILLAN
    GIDDYVILLAN January 28, 2014 at 1:25 pm . Reply

    ‘we play on the ground,we play on the ground we are the villa we play on the ground’. 🙂

  15. billys boots
    billys boots January 28, 2014 at 2:09 pm . Reply

    one of the funniest was we used to sing”Alex Alex cropely” and after that horror tackle at villa park the baggies started singing “Alex Alex cant walk properly”

    1. OohAhPaulMcGrath
      OohAhPaulMcGrath January 28, 2014 at 6:42 pm . Reply

      Remember when tony Adams was in the nick. Are you watching from the nick lol

  16. billys boots
    billys boots January 28, 2014 at 2:15 pm . Reply

    another one was down at the blues ground the news in the mail was that Francis wanted a transfer so the chant started Francis wants a transfer Francis wants a transfer na na na naa as it tailed of there was a hopeless through ball to him that missed by half the pitch and the chant carried on we don’t fucking blame we don’t fucking blame him
    na na na naa

  17. Adam
    Adam January 28, 2014 at 7:42 pm . Reply

    “Your supposed to be in jail” to harry redknapp and van persie

    I also quite liked the villa away fans singing “lets pretend we’ve scored a goal” on youtube worth a watch.

  18. Morgan Villa
    Morgan Villa January 28, 2014 at 9:07 pm . Reply

    Some of these have really made me chuckle.

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